Shhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhh

Trip Start Aug 23, 1996
1
367
583
Trip End Ongoing


Loading Map
Map Options
Show trip route
Hide lines
shadow

Flag of Portugal  ,
Sunday, November 18, 2007

What a year it has been so far. I've been to quite a few different places, even had a stint in hospital, but what really stands out in my mind has been the reaquaintence with Portugal, so why stop when you are having fun. This weeks destination is the capital, a place we haven't been to in over nine years. Lisbon
 
Lisbon
 
For a capital city, they do make it hard to get in. Eventually a bus arrived, and we made our way in. The bed was found pretty fast, so we dumped the bags and hit the streets. Now normally in life, they say the older you are, you tend to remember less, but as soon as we walked into our first square, memories of the place came flooding back.
 
After a quick coffee and chocolate croissant, I encountered my first fuckwit. Hashish !!! Memories of India/Nepal came flooding back. I wanted to hit him with the LP, but Lucy wouldn't let me, so instead, we jumped on the number 28 tram for a ride through the streets. We jumped out at Largo di Graca, had a look at the lookout, and could see all of Lisbon. As it's built into a series of hills, it appeared to look like a bigger Oporto. Just everything squashed in. We walked down to Igrejade Sao Vincente de Fora. It's a huge old monastery. Inside was pretty empty, so it didn't take long to get bored. Outside was a market, so we strolled around it. Most of the stuff was of the African variety so we didn't buy anything as we were here to see Portugal, not Africa !!!  We started following the next road, and after a couple of ups and downs, we were greeted by the entrance to the Castelo de Sao Jorge. It was originally built by the moors, but was taken over by the Catholics. Many years ago we came up here, and I tried to cut a Super Bock flag and nearly chopped my finger off, so I  only remember the spilt blood. It was pretty big with loads of view points, so I did the only thing possible, I took loads of photos.
 
Once outside, we followed some  stairs and walked into the Se, or in English, the cathedral. It's huge and pretty nice, it's also pretty old. After we walked out, we got lost !!! Eventually we saw the old elevator. As we made our way over, an older guy came over and said, hash. I ignored him, then a younger guy came over and said, hashishhhhhhhhhhhh. So I looked at him, and said shhhhhhhhhh, then he told me to fuck off, so I said shhhhhhhhhh, then he said fuck off, so I said shhhhhhhhhh. He then went to spit on me !!!!! It was beginning to get tiresome this fucking hash shit, so we jumped in the over a 100 year old elevator and went for a ride. Once again there were some good views. Actually, the reason why they built this kind of Gustav Eiffel inspired elevator, was so that the locals wouldn't have to climb another hill, so we used it for that reason. We are lazy fuckers actually !!!
 
It was getting late, and Lucy wanted  to find a locals bar before dinner, so we walked through the Alfama area, then one appeared. Inside, we hit the red. It was pretty good. So after a couple I attempted my Portuguese skills, which didn't work, so as the barman was feeling sorry for us, he gave us some  port and told us to come back after dinner as he had some better stuff for us. Now being a tourist here, the done thing is to see Fado. This is where a couple of guys play guitars and locals sing traditional songs. Thy also charge you a fortune for pretty crappy food, so being the good tourists that we are, we had to partake !!! The singing was actually good, and the food was pretty crappy, so we paid up and went for more port, and fuck me, the next lot was better, so after midnite, we rolled out blind !!!
 
We walked the streets a drunken mess, and came to a huge gate, I think I might have blurred the photos !!! Then number four fuckwit came to me. Hashish !!! So this time I yelled, policia, policia, this man is selling drugs !!! He left me alone after that !!!
 
We both awoke hungover with the mother of all headaches !!!
 
Back on the number 28, we went to the Panteao Nacional. Inside it contains various cenotaphs for people like Vasco da Gama, but the highlight here is, up on the roof is another view point !!! We got over that pretty quickly as well, so we jumed back on the number 28, then onto the number 15, as we need to get to Belem.
 
Belem
 
It's 5 k's away, and there are various reasons to go. We wanted to see Mosteiro dos Jeronimos. It's a huge old church and Vasco da Gama is buried inside. We couldn't see much as it's Sunday and mass was on, so we hit the cloisters instead. They have been restored and are very cloistery. There are a couple of nice museums as well. Actually, the main reason for Belem being famous is, this  was the place from where Vasco set out to discover the world. If only he had found Australia, then I would be speaking Portuguese !!! Nearly across from the Mosteiro, is the Torre de Belem. It's over 500 years old, so we entered and had a walk. It's meant to guard the harbour, and it has done a good job, as Portugal has never been invaded since it has been erected !!! Down the road is the Padrao dos Descobrimentos. It's another monument dedicated to Henry the navigator and Vasco and whoever else was big in town.
 
Back to Lisbon
 
Time was running out, so we took the 15, then the 28 again, as Lucy wanted to buy some porcelein. They were pretty nice pieces, and very cheap as well. And then it happened, yet again, hashish. I am now very sick of this, and the only way to escape was was to jump on a bus, and go back to the airport as our time was now up
 
And Finally
 
I can't believe that I have now been to Portugal three times this year. I am a slack fucker in the fact that it's taken me nine years to get back. What a place, I love it, but there are far to many drug dealers for my liking. I tried many things such as:
 
Hashish Man - Hashish
Me - No
Hashish Man - Fuck off
 
Hashish Man - Hashish
Me - I ignored him
Hashish Man - Fuck off
 
Hashish Man - Hashish
Me - Shhhhhhhhhhhhhhhh
Hashish Man - Fuck off
 
Hashish Man - Hashish
Me - Policia, Policia
Hashish Man - Fuck off
 
Shoot them all is what I say !!!
Slideshow Report as Spam

Pictures

Use this image in your site

Copy and paste this html:

Table of Contents