Oktoberfest the Ninth

Trip Start Aug 23, 1996
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Monday, October 2, 2006

Sometimes a roll of a dice takes us places that we never expect to go. Back in March, while recovering in Australia, I never thought that I would be sitting here now writing this story. As we all know, or the one's who follow the career of the Uncle, he was offered a job back in the UK working for his former employer. Maybe it was the sickness at the time that made him say yes, maybe it was the lure of being back where his heart belongs, Europe, but as soon as I said yes, arrangements were made to attend the glamorous 2006 Oktoberfest. Hotels and flights were booked and the countdown started. I had 15 weeks to get into form, so I grabbed some training partners, Al the King of Cool, Paul and Big Al and every Friday we would have a lunchtime session. Things were looking good. My liver was coping well, and I was coming along fine. A couple of weeks before the big event, I moved into some extra training. The local Thai supermarket sold Beer Lao. Having had a nice time on it in Laos, I bought up big time, and started drinking this fine beverage quite regularly. My immunity was growing, and the day before we left, I toasted my good health with another couple of Beer Laos.

The flight was a flight, nothing uneventful. I had a couple of warm up beers, but seeing we were flying BA, they were only Carlsberg and Heineken. Once on the ground, we jumped on a train and made our way in. Bavarians were getting on at the stops, loads of Lederhosen and Dirndls. Dressed in their local traditional clothes. Kind of cool, but kind of 80's !!! We jumped out and went to the hotel. Our station is the closest to the ground, so it was packed. Our hotel by the way is only 200 metres from the grounds so we dumped our bags and got ourselves ready. The drinking time was upon us

The sun was shining so we knew we would have trouble finding a seat. The majority of the tents were not letting people in, and it was full of sleazy fucking Italians, who were groping at Lucy. Fuck I wish my Italian was better, so we decided that we would blow the fest out for a couple of hours. However, not far away, is the Augustiner beer garden, and we knew we would have no problems. This was jammers as well. We grabbed our beers and found a seat. That first sip of Augustiner made me forget all about my Beer Laos and English beer. It was so good. The first one flowed down. Fuck me, just a year ago, I had been in Iran and Pakistan during the festival, so I had to make up for lost time. I moved onto a second, third and fourth one in no time. The sun had gone, so we decided to leave and go back to the fest. Straight down to the Lowenbrau tent, we ran into Bomber who owns PP Travel, who we get our hotel through. Bomber, who knows everyone, got us inside, even though they were not letting people in still, and we started another bout. Into the throng of people we went, and jumped on the PP table. Within 5 minutes, I had slipped, some fucker fell on me. Half my beer went. Sacrilege. So I downed it and got the dick to buy me another. I finished the beer and we were then kicked out. Lucy decided that as it has been a few years since we have stolen an empty stein, and as it's Paul's birthday in a couple of days, she decided that this would be the perfect present for him. All was going to plan. She slipped past three security guards, and was just about out the door, when one came from nowhere and rugby tackled her !!! Oh well. At least she tried for you Paul, more than I can say for myself !!! We moved on over to the Schnapps tent, and had 4 shots. I was pretty pissed by this stage so I had a kartofellen mit knoblauch sauce. Whilst eating, I kind of lost Lucy. She was with some mulletted Germans when I last saw her, so I knew she was safe. I walked back to the hotel, and decided to have a roadie in the bar. Lucy eventually joined, and next thing I knew, I was waking up. Fuck knows how I got to/in bed !!!

Steins drunk - 6
Schnapps shots - 4

Food eaten - 1 Schweinwurst und Sauerkraut, 1 Halb Hendl, 1 Kartofellen mit Knoblauch sauce, 1 Schweinsbraten mit Kartoffellkunodel


Waking up in the morning was hard. No, it was fucking hard. My head was hurting and I didn't think I could stomach breakfast. I forced myself to. As a gift to myself, I went back to bed. Pussy I hear you all say, well, fuck you all. At least I'm here !!! Eventually I showered and went to the fest. Round 2. We walked around, having a look at various tents. I wasn't quite sure whether my body was ready for a beer, so we just walked. I was in a daze. My legs knew what was happening, and they took the Fischer Vroni tent. I sat, ordered an Augustiner, and it was actually pretty good. So I ordered another. My body was craving food so I had a Seelachsruckenfilet. And it was great. The fish here is so good. I washed it down with another stein and we moved on to the Lowenbrau tent. The doors were locked and they were not letting anyone inside. However, around the back, we ran into our Frauline, Susanna, and she said she could get us in the backdoor. My favourite entrance !!! As we entering, we ran into Bomber again. Straight to our normal spot, under the bandstand, we climbed up and started drinking , singing dancing, well dancing as good as you can when you are pissed as a pissed up Aussie can be. On my 6th stein, I realised it was a mistake. Halfway through it, the beer decided it didn't like my stomach and throat. It fought a battle to come up, and they were trying to keep it down. My insides won, but I decided that I couldn't drink anymore. So I decided to check out the talent instead. Across from me, I spied this young girl, so I said g'day, and asked for her name. She said Kristin and so we started talking. I mentioned my blog site, and she goes which one are you with. I said Travelpod, and she goes, so am I !!! So, realising I had turned into a pussy, I grabbed another stein, and drunk one with her. Amazingly, the beer stayed down, but it wasn't feeling good, and as I finished it, we were kicked out of the tent. Personally, I believe it was the shots that had killed me the previous night, so we went for a Kartofellen mit Knoblauch sauce again. We followed that up with a 1/2 meter Bratwurst in der semmel, and washed down in the hotel with halb hendl. What a great second day this had turned out to be

Steins drunk - 6

Food eaten - 1 Hax n Semmel, 1 Halb Hendl, 1 Kartofellen mit Knoblauch sauce, 1 1/2 Meter Bratwurst in der Semmel, 1 Seelachsruckenfilet


It is now Monday, and this year, because Tuesday is a national holiday, they have extended the Oktoberfest another two days. This is the reason we have come on the last weekend. Amazingly, my body has been coping with the amount of abuse that it has received, in both food and beer. After breakfast, we did our usual tourist shopping thing. Postcards for the family and crap like that. Then it happened, it felt like my body was shutting down. I thought I was going to be physically sick. There was only one way to counteract this feeling and that was to have a beer. Straight in to the Fischer Vroni tent, I scored a couple of seats inside. I ordered the first Augustiner. My body started to relax immediately. Just the medicine. Our table filled up with Germans. Some who could speak English and some who couldn't. As the day past us by, we eventually had a full house. A load of young ones from Stuttgart and three Bavarians. The beer was flowing, we were all dancing like there was no tomorrow. The best thing about this tent, is the lack of tourists. Because of this, they tend to play the more traditional German songs. By the end of the night, I was pretty pissed. My body was now screaming at me. It needed food, Lucy wanted schnapps, but I couldn't deliver. Reluctantly, she accepted her fate that tonight was not schnapps night so we settled on food instead

Steins drunk - 6

Food eaten - 1 Mackrel, 1 Halb Hendl, 1 Kartofellen mit Knoblauch sauce, 1 1/2 Meter Bratwurst in der Semmel, 1 Seelachsruckenfilet


I think the abuse on my body has now taken its toll. During the night, I started to suffer pains in my kidney and liver area. Is it the after effects of Hepatitis, or is my body just complaining that it needs a beer !!! We walked into the grounds and I realised that my body couldn't tolerate a beer. So we walked around taking it in. Across the road from the grounds is a huge church, St Pauls, which you can climb up and get a good view of the grounds. 252 steps later, I was fucked. How I manage to walk the Annapurna circuit is beyond me !!! Fuck I am so unfit. Great view though. We had one last quick walk again. I love this place.

What more is there to say about Munich and the Oktoberfest. The ninth time here, nothing changes but it is always great to come. Personally, I think everyone should try it once in their lives.

The Good

Bavarian girls in their dirndls. How they manage to keep their tits in is beyond me, but fuck I love looking !!!

The Bad

Me. Every morning is horrible. Struggling, thinking of that first beer. Fearing, loathing it until I sip, and then I realise that I need at least another 5 steins !!!

The Ugly

Italians. Don't get me wrong, I love Italians. I have met loads over the years, but at the Oktoberfest, they are horrible lecherous groping people. I am not the only one to think this. If only they could be like me. Window shoppers. Look, but don't touch !!!
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scottwoz
scottwoz on

Moving with the times
Nice pics. The entry insert thing's worked a treat..

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