Sex, Sex, Sex
Trip Start
Jul 03, 2007
1
5
13
Trip End
Jul 24, 2007
Sex sells and hopefully that title caused you to open this entry, but alas nothing about sex.
I am trying really hard to like the Tanzanians, the guide book says they are friendly, well the guide book is wrong so far as I can tell. The de facto greeting in Arusha is 'have you booked a safari'. Wankers.
Dar-es-Salaam conjured up wonderful, romantic images - Dhouws bobbing in the harbour, spices wafting, etc. Its a shit hole. Whilst sweating my arse off in Dar I was offered a discount on a safari to the Serengeti to see the wildebeest stampede across the plains - there were injuries as I stampeded to my room to pack. Arusha here I come.
I arrived after a 10 hour bus journey aboard a 'luxury' coach, what can you say about a 10 hour bus journey, well this basically - it was awful. I did not understand a word anyone said it was like they were talking Swahili, oh hang on a mo, they were talking Swahili!! Regular readers to this blog may recall the bus journey in Zambia where I had two very uncomfortable positions, well on my luxury bus I had one - back straight, knees jammed into the seat in front. However, luck was on my side as when Mr Chubby got on, guess where his seat was - right next to me; he then fell asleep and snored. Later in the journey he left his seat and stood up near the front, great he's leaving I thought, wrong - we were about to stop for food and Mr Chubby wanted to be off first. Fat git.
During my 10.5 hours (scheduled 8 hours) of purgatory I came up with the following disadvantages of being tall when travelling.............
- no leg room
- beds always too short
- ceilings on buses too low
- tents too short
- airplane toilets too small
The advantages are that you rarely get hassled.
Here is my Guide to negotaiting a reduced taxi fare, late at night, after a 10.5 bus journey:
1) Sling bags into cab and jump in
2) Request a price, divide my 3 and make an offer
3) When cabbie refuses, threaten to get another cab, leap out, unload bags and seek another cab
4) Realise that there is only ONE cab, and the driver is looking straight at me
5) Jump back in, agree to his price, proceed 200 yards up the road to your hotel.
So long, I'm off to the Serengeti............
I am trying really hard to like the Tanzanians, the guide book says they are friendly, well the guide book is wrong so far as I can tell. The de facto greeting in Arusha is 'have you booked a safari'. Wankers.
Dar-es-Salaam conjured up wonderful, romantic images - Dhouws bobbing in the harbour, spices wafting, etc. Its a shit hole. Whilst sweating my arse off in Dar I was offered a discount on a safari to the Serengeti to see the wildebeest stampede across the plains - there were injuries as I stampeded to my room to pack. Arusha here I come.
I arrived after a 10 hour bus journey aboard a 'luxury' coach, what can you say about a 10 hour bus journey, well this basically - it was awful. I did not understand a word anyone said it was like they were talking Swahili, oh hang on a mo, they were talking Swahili!! Regular readers to this blog may recall the bus journey in Zambia where I had two very uncomfortable positions, well on my luxury bus I had one - back straight, knees jammed into the seat in front. However, luck was on my side as when Mr Chubby got on, guess where his seat was - right next to me; he then fell asleep and snored. Later in the journey he left his seat and stood up near the front, great he's leaving I thought, wrong - we were about to stop for food and Mr Chubby wanted to be off first. Fat git.
During my 10.5 hours (scheduled 8 hours) of purgatory I came up with the following disadvantages of being tall when travelling.............
- no leg room
- beds always too short
- ceilings on buses too low
- tents too short
- airplane toilets too small
The advantages are that you rarely get hassled.
Here is my Guide to negotaiting a reduced taxi fare, late at night, after a 10.5 bus journey:
1) Sling bags into cab and jump in
2) Request a price, divide my 3 and make an offer
3) When cabbie refuses, threaten to get another cab, leap out, unload bags and seek another cab
4) Realise that there is only ONE cab, and the driver is looking straight at me
5) Jump back in, agree to his price, proceed 200 yards up the road to your hotel.
So long, I'm off to the Serengeti............


Comments
well, welcome to Tanzania!!! don't know what you expected when you agreed to a "reduced"price safari but that's what you get. you have to undestand that people don't necessarily want to speak to you either in the bus and Tanzania is a country where the local language (swahili) is valued and they are proud to keep it this way. i don't believe that you would necessarily talk to anyone on the bus to some touristic site wherever you come from. learn the local language and customs a bit next time you travel to an african country, you'll hopefully find the experience much more interesting...
Am not Tanzanian but am amazed, someone did not know that there are tour vehicles in TZ? About languange, we too have visited some of the countries in the continent where you Mr. or Mdama comes from and often we do not pick a word they say, should we attack them too? Tourism should be about learning especially of you are the tourist and not you teaching. Style up, clean your dirty mouth. Next time first unlearn so that you can learn.
Uhm,
why is that such backwardness exists? Why is it that everyone who cannot speak English will be looked down at? Please Mr/Madam traveller you belong to the pre existence era, what we rebuffed you for not knowing Swahili. Did you ever fill an application Form to be born where you were? Talikng of a long bus ride then somewhere you tell us of aircraft toilets as part of the conclusions on the journey, so which of them did you use? Try saving to be treated as a real tourist, not the pauper you were then.
mr. traveller you have really amazed me. it seems that this was your first tourist destination. otherwise you would not have complained like you did. don't read people's cultures into your face. this world is diverse and the people on this planet are diverse too. be versatile and stop complaining like a little kid.
thanks for the replies; most of the blog was sarcastic e.g. the swahili comment, its an english joke - and I think you all missed the sarcasm, but it was aimed at my english friends. Although I was disappointed with the people in Dar - the guide book said one thing, reality the other. Compared to Zambia they were unfriendly.
The safari was excellent in the end, probably best experience.
Overall though fond memories of Tanzania - its a fab country
we nimjinga
bugger off dimwit. you still live in colonial days when your type took it upon themselves to "civilize" africans. And clearly those genes still run in your self conceited guts. what did you expect when you bought a bus ticket in Tanzania? a boat ride? maybe you should have come with your plymouth or whatever you drive where you come from. And yep, we speak swahili, and we have no apologies to make. And for some of us we can speak and write better English than you too. so next time you wanna visit our country...leave the smelly attitude in your little house in Europe. Better still, keep your short green notes and long pink nose there too. We can do just fine without the likes of you.
ur cheap that y ,utook cheap offers wat did you expect ?arusha is full of luxury hotel and safari tours like leopard safari,abrojaley africa ajabu tour and hotels like kibo ,ngurudoto naura ,snowcrest this are some of five star hotels in arusha ,istill dont see y ur complainin while you went cheap ur self
You better stop making a tour to african and other countries of our type (except yours, may be) becouse you have a very thin fixed mind which is not there to learn and create but it is for looking...there must be something wrong in your head, especially thinking capacity. YES!, WE BELIEVE WE CAN MAKE IT WITHOUT YOU AND YOUR TYPE. THE ARE OTHER PEOPLE FROM YOUR COUNTRY ENJOYING BEING HERE AT AFRICA ESPECIALLY TANZANIA, only you?...sorry for being of this type but take my piece of advise, that you still need to change for you better whatsoever
Please fellow Africans,forgive the mzungu,he thought we would understand and enjoy his jokes but we are African not wazungu and we proud to be African.
This isnt funny, but i Think the traveller ought to be a sick person who doesnot understand the world. his actions caused by his stupid thinking drove him to what I may call a mind hell.we are not making buses here nor an aircraft so who is to blame, after all he wanted cheap stuff like staying at nyumba za wageni uchochoroni and in that case he deserves to get what he got: misleading guide? Yes ! he wanted a cheap stuff and bought that guide from a person who even do not know that there is a new guide in town, cheap stuff will always make you pay through the nose. By the way am speaking this because i want the mzungu to stop naging like a stupid little kid
This blut might have been in the outerspace or somewhere else!!!
Am not a mzungu but I have travelled widely. ALL CONTINENTS. As for the language, as someone has said, we speak Swahili, are proud of it and NO APOLOGIES. As for the other stuff, you deserve it. That is what you could afford damn you. Even at that level, I guarantee you, you could NEVER gotten as much from where you came from. I KNOW.
Thats now the real Tansania.A country in alot of backwardness with no civility LIVING IN UTOPIA.AM aN Ethiopian
Well welcome to Tanzania, you haven't seen nothing yet. You should realize that you can never teach new tricks to closed minds. Constructive criticism is only welcome if foreigners are considered welcome. Foreign investment is taking a turn for the worst so let the blind lead the blind. Just get out of the way.
I NEED SWEETY GAL FOR RELAX WIT HER SO IF IS THERE CHECK ME,I WILL PAY azizally2003@yahoo.com alway am online
Arusha ladies email me
{brakelyn_bullz@yahoo.com},
lets have fun..
Nahitaji kupata mwanamke atakayenilelea watoto tutakao zaa pamoja nae
Nahitaji mchumba wa kuishinae walau kwa mda wa miaka miwili .Awena rangi kidogo na mcha mungu.kwa ma wasiliano tumia [thoykadogo@yahoo.com
always exit with a clear picture where you are going. know what hotel you want to go to and find out from the hotel. a ruff cost of it.
this way you can swat those fly catchers... just like the ones that have been posting below.
With travel you will always need an open mind, and open heart and more important and very carfully tight walet.
You will not find "that discounted" safari that you have heard a friend of a friend brought when they went to africa. It is best you go with a licenced dealer, rather then loosing your money to a mwizi (thief)
I lived in the tz reagons for many years.. and you can expect the best that they can offer including no personal space! And many people trying ot rip you off. But on the other hand, i miss the coutry side, my very dear friends and serengeti beer!
Sitaki... sitaki sana kuruka!! I do not want fly cathcher!
FOR WHAT SHOULD BE A LOVE CALL ME IF YOUR A GIRL LOOKING FOR MAN . I LIKE IT AND I LOVE IT ,BUT DON'T ACT AT COST .TAKE ME HIGH ;BE HAPPY FOR WHAT I AM GOING TO PROVIDE YOU TO YOUR LIFE ,MAY BE A CHILD OR ANY YOU LIKE IT MY NUMBER IS 0654281635 OR 0715502003
ACHENI MAMBO YA NGONO NYIE MAFALA
kwanza i wanna tell the mzungu that, we guys have been around the world a lot. we have had a lot of experiences in the places we went. lucky enough, we have families in countries we have been visiting having good lives, and from the lives we found, we have been able to give a look in the lower levels of life as we explored some places in europe.
its true that, you get what you can afford. its too strange for him as a mzungu to think that because of whatever he is, he should have been afforded a five to seven star reception and lifestyle while all his pockets matched were daladala experiences, the local guest houses and normal services that have no verified standards!
i urge him to go back, take more part time jobs and do whatever good as he may please to reap more money. next time, he can roll back to africa, and have the best of experiences in five star hotels, private 4x4 travel vehicles, private guides, fully provided tour gear, lessons and experiences that are unforgettable.
and for best experiences, ask those who have come and do repeatedly come to visit africa due to their appreciation of what the continent can offer that is very unique, pleasant, marvelous, splendid, great, brilliant, gorgeous, excellent, unbeatable and all the good you can say about africa.
i don't blame you, as one person said, you never filled a paper to have been born where you were or have the life style and level of life you have, pull up your socks, build better perspective and have reasons for why you wanna do something.
it feels for me like you never meant to come as a tourist but rather as someone with no fixed directions, had you set a plan in advance, you could have a better story to tell.
just like all other societies are divided and have classes of lives, so is ours! some of us have had the luck of being where we are, but africa buys cars, and cars are made in the world standard, if you happen to be abnormal, you can file your esteemed complain to the UN.
as for the ethiopian dude above, i guess i better reserve my comments. because its very offensive using peoples minds. you see, lots of people commenting in this forum and sharing logical content, and this dude out of no where comes in and pops up some content that is baseless, unfounded and holds no water. its quite likely that he does not know where he is at the moment and can not tell the life standard he is in and probably an ethiopian fly catcher. buddy, if truly you are an ethiopin fly catcher wanting to corn cheap tourists like the complainant herein, i urge you to think again, you might kill yourself, its like seeking blood from a mosquito, the tourist has nothing to share with you apart from calling you a thief, then i wonder what you will have against or for him! be who you are and be at its best. if you are in the wrong path, jump to class, get some lessons and be a tour-guide then you can get paid by your company instead of being a slave and actin unreasonably to comments you are not aware about for rewards of a single word of curse!
otherwise, i wish you all guys luck and praise you for your love for the culture and the country.
services, experiences, memories and more, all depend on the person facing them, how they want to face and how they are prepared for the same.
you get what you can afford and not more or less, be it in life or in prayers!
so, better watch your language dude, better be careful!
sarcasm and irony or anything of that nature, has no attention here, grab a private blog and talk to wazungu, here people of diverse cultures meet!
kwanza i wanna tell the mzungu that, we guys have been around the world a lot. we have had a lot of experiences in the places we went. lucky enough, we have families in countries we have been visiting having good lives, and from the lives we found, we have been able to give a look in the lower levels of life as we explored some places in europe.
its true that, you get what you can afford. its too strange for him as a mzungu to think that because of whatever he is, he should have been afforded a five to seven star reception and lifestyle while all his pockets matched were daladala experiences, the local guest houses and normal services that have no verified standards!
i urge him to go back, take more part time jobs and do whatever good as he may please to reap more money. next time, he can roll back to africa, and have the best of experiences in five star hotels, private 4x4 travel vehicles, private guides, fully provided tour gear, lessons and experiences that are unforgettable.
and for best experiences, ask those who have come and do repeatedly come to visit africa due to their appreciation of what the continent can offer that is very unique, pleasant, marvelous, splendid, great, brilliant, gorgeous, excellent, unbeatable and all the good you can say about africa.
i don't blame you, as one person said, you never filled a paper to have been born where you were or have the life style and level of life you have, pull up your socks, build better perspective and have reasons for why you wanna do something.
it feels for me like you never meant to come as a tourist but rather as someone with no fixed directions, had you set a plan in advance, you could have a better story to tell.
just like all other societies are divided and have classes of lives, so is ours! some of us have had the luck of being where we are, but africa buys cars, and cars are made in the world standard, if you happen to be abnormal, you can file your esteemed complain to the UN.
as for the ethiopian dude above, i guess i better reserve my comments. because its very offensive using peoples minds. you see, lots of people commenting in this forum and sharing logical content, and this dude out of no where comes in and pops up some content that is baseless, unfounded and holds no water. its quite likely that he does not know where he is at the moment and can not tell the life standard he is in and probably an ethiopian fly catcher. buddy, if truly you are an ethiopin fly catcher wanting to corn cheap tourists like the complainant herein, i urge you to think again, you might kill yourself, its like seeking blood from a mosquito, the tourist has nothing to share with you apart from calling you a thief, then i wonder what you will have against or for him! be who you are and be at its best. if you are in the wrong path, jump to class, get some lessons and be a tour-guide then you can get paid by your company instead of being a slave and actin unreasonably to comments you are not aware about for rewards of a single word of curse!
otherwise, i wish you all guys luck and praise you for your love for the culture and the country.
services, experiences, memories and more, all depend on the person facing them, how they want to face and how they are prepared for the same.
you get what you can afford and not more or less, be it in life or in prayers!
so, better watch your language dude, better be careful!
sarcasm and irony or anything of that nature, has no attention here, grab a private blog and talk to wazungu, here people of diverse cultures meet!
. . . i forgot, just to add to the above, i urge the others that, this is not a sex platform to play your babyclass games. please, behave yourselves. here, you act worse than the mzungu, because you are portraying your dirty and stinky personalities. anyway, may be you are some of those who have nothing to do and unluckily cant have anything. just behave!
Hi travellers, What is up? Do you know which company in Tanzania which takes people to the off beaten track? Do you know which company charges reasonable prices and offer the best services in Tanzania and in East Africa in general? Do you know which company treats customers like members of their family? Do not think about any orher company but only the EYES IN THE BUSH!!! MACHO PONINI WILL TAKE YOU TO WHEREVER YOU WANT AND OFFER YOU THE BEST SERVICES. THE ANSWERS FOR ALL THE QUESTIONS IS MACHO PORINI. IF YOU MENTION MACHO PORINI YOU GET EVERYTHING YOU WANT AND EVERYTHING YOU DREAM ABOUT. MAKE YOUR HOLIDAY IN TANZANIA AND CHOOSE MACHO PORINI.
jamami naomba nijulishwe kwa nini 2napay attention kubwa kwenye masuala fulani tu
Next time this guy or his sort visits us he should tell his height so he is accomodated in colonial facilities!
hi i am looking for she,hwo can be care for me.more ifomation .Go thruu the imali. zamweli@yahoo.com
i nid a girl sexiest one lovely..... thru ma email aweru2001@yahoo.com
anagongwa huyo
DUU ARUSHA MNATISHA
NAMTAFUTA DEM WA KIZUNGU ATAKAYE KUBALI KUNYWA MTORI NA TAMADUNI ZINGINE ZA KICHAGA. Email yangu ni peternkya@yahoo.com
what is love
we nifala huna akili
halafu ww una akili nyingi sana
kila mtu ana tafsiri yake. na tafsiri ya hii kitu zipo zaidi ya 100
poor you!how do u think you can get the best with few dollars,u want to see the tanzanian sweet welcome mooooood....drop some dollars.LOL!!!!
mambooz.
i need a very sexy and sweety girl to have fun with her for 1 week and to go out together. if any one intresting pls send me e-mail.
bongo_799@hotmail.com