A True Conundrum
Trip Start
Feb 23, 2010
1
16
38
Trip End
Jul 02, 2010
Zhenjiang, Jiangsu, China
Thursday, March 18, 2010
What do "Chinglish Gone Wrong" and "Itty Bitty Bear Condition" have in common?
Answer: EVERYTHING.
One of the perks about being in a region where little to no English is spoken is that you get to witness the most atrocious bombings of the English language. We're keeping a running list, some of which includes the following:
*A sign reading "Baby on Road"
*A line in an email written to Matt, reading "I'm sorry if this decision has made you hard."
*Another line in an email written to Matt (um, I'm seeing a theme here...Matt?), reading "feel free to touch me up on this one" (the student was referring to a wrong email address and provided Matt with the correct one)
*An experience in Hannah's class: Today in class, her students put a list of ingredients on the board and they listed "Blow". She asked them if there really was "blow" in the sweet and sour pork and they insisted. We now know that chinese food contains both MSG and cocaine! Okay, but they really meant to say "bowl"...
*A sweatshirt with the following phrase written in big, bold letters across the front: "Itty Bitty Bear Condition." I'm sorry, but what condition??? Itty Bitty Bear? What the f.
*An incident in MY class today: some guy in my class was trying to explain the difference between his generation and his parents' generation. This is what he said: "In my parents' generation, you could just birth children freely." I literally had to stop myself from laughing uncontrollably for a good 5 minutes...I couldn't let it go.
*A label on a wine bottle: "It is a good wine from heaven and souls .That can read our happiness and sadness, like a bosom friend bringing us warmth. It lets cheers burst in out minds. It gives us magic wings leading you to the flying dreams."
Also, many of us have students in our classes who choose English names. Here are a few:
*Sunshine
*Cinderella
*Franks (yes, that's "Frank" with an "s" at the end)
*Hill (the best part is that this gentleman told me he wanted an American name but couldn't tell if it was masculine or feminine...when I asked him what the name was, he responded "Hill." All I could do was pause, and say, "............yup, that's a masculine name FOR SURE, so let's call you Hill."
*Pet
*Sugar
*Honey
*Army
*Simba
*Sorphiay (yes, but this one's tricky--when she introduced herself to me, it sounded like "Stephanie." But when I asked her to spell it, she spelled it S-O-R-P-H-I-A-Y. Then, when she introduced herself to Hannah, it came out as "Sophany." I think she means Sophia, but I'm sticking with the odd combination between Sophie and Stephanie)
*Google (my personal favorite)
Despite the entertainment provided by the Chinese, I felt myself beginning to slip into a more frequent mode of frustration and anxiety this week. The frustration came from constantly being stared and laughed at--it's to the point where it no longer feels flattering, but rather flat-out rude. I understand that this is a small city and that the inhabitants are not used to seeing foreigners--believe me, I get it. But there comes a time when, despite our physical differences, we have to realize that we're all still human beings. All of the staring, pointing, gawking, and laughing make me feel like I'm somehow less than human--like I'm just an object to be stared at. It's REALLY starting to get to me, and sometimes I just want to scream, "What the hell are you staring at?! I'm just a person!!!!!!" The one redeeming aspect of this troubling situation is that I had the opportunity to turn the tables Wednesday night. As the four of us were walking back from our St. Patrick's Day dinner (at a Korean Barbecue restaurant), a group of girls slowed down to stare as they passed us. Without even realizing it, I met their eyes and stared right back, but with my really creepy grin on my face (those of you who know me well know EXACTLY what look I'm referring to). Again, it was a completely sub-conscious reaction, but holy crap, it worked! The girls did a disturbed double-take, then quickly walked away and didn't look at me again. Ah it felt soooo good. Unfortunately, I tried it on a pair of guys, but got a completely different reaction--apparently my level of creepiness wasn't enough to deter the boys from staring even harder. Oh well, it was a worthy attempt. Since Wednesday I've found myself either looking straight ahead and not making eye contact as I walk, or else giving really dirty looks to those who are so unbelievably blatant about their gawking. If only looks could kill...just kidding. No but seriously.
And then there's the anxiety. One of the lessons I must learn while I'm over here is how to say no to people. I have so many great students, so many new potential friends, but sometimes they can be SO persistent to hang out. I am trying my hardest to keep a positive perspective and appreciate that they want to spend time with me, but it becomes slightly overwhelming to receive a constant barrage of emails and phone calls pertaining to social gatherings. What makes it even more difficult is that my students pass around my email address to other people who don't even know who I am, yet they still invite me to do things with them. Or else these unknown people want help with English. Sometimes I just feel like I'm being pulled in several different directions, or that there's a crowd of people that keeps growing and surrounding me, all the while pushing me into a corner. So I have to get better about maintaining balance and setting boundaries.
Enough with the negativity. To end on a more-than-amusing note, I'm posting a video of Charles doing the "Funky Chicken" during our hall party on Friday. I feel like I haven't been able to sum him up using words, so hopefully this video accomplishes that which I cannot.
Comments
You are handling it really well Tiff. You have already noticed that unlike here in the U.S. the population around that part of the world is not as racially diverse. If you haven't already sensed it yet, it is a different kind of racism and for the same reason, I do not think that people who are trying to hang out with you have anything to do with love of learning English. You know what I mean. Stay safe.
Great Posting! Love the mistranslations. You need to learn how to tell people off if theyre offending you with their staring, gestures as well as a few swear words go a long way in preserving personal space overseas, Im sure the chinese have some great words for pervert or "what are you looking at" that will send your foes fleeing in shame when used discreetly. Show them youre not as lost and far away as you look, its similair to learning how to stand up against hustlers and the rif raf of any major city, choose your battles, stand your ground and at all times pay attention. Keep your head up and stay strong!
well u know what? As a chinese, my suggestion might be ....man up a little bit and you'll just be fine....if, hypothetically, some guy here has the guts to violate a girl, he'd rather choose a chinese girl..trust me
Chinese people take many thing for granted, u may already gotten my point.