Patagonia
Trip Start
Dec 03, 2004
1
7
16
Trip End
Apr 10, 2005
Torres del Paine National Park, Chile
Monday, December 27, 2004
Explora is just a ridiculous place. I can't even begin to describe it. Marcelle and I were living way over our heads on this one. I'll try to break it all down, day by day, but it's not easy. Also, Marcelle has all the notes on this. I'm writing completely from memory.
Sunday:
Van ride over, sick views from van. See our first of the fifteen thousand Guanacos (think the Camel's retarded cousin) we'd see during the week. Check into hotel. Room is sick, view of waterfall from window, chocolates on pillow. We arrived in afternoon, most people arrived in morning, so they were off hiking already. Check out pool area. Hit up the open air jacuzzi on lake. Sick. Come back to lodge. See a helicopter land, depositing a (RICH) family - sick. Briefed on the options for the next days hikes - we chose full day to Gray Glacier. Other guests return from hikes .. 60+ guests, 12 or so guides in all. Dinner time. Meal is great..every one is three courses and very freshly prepared. Great staff. Bar is open and always included. Wine is from owner's personal vineyards. Back to room. Chocolate on pillows is replaced. Nice touch.
Monday:
Hike to gray glacier. On our walk is Pierre and Kara from the van. Brian and Andreas, a British couple who provided endless laughts throughout the trip (Marcelle termed them our boyfriends), the helicopter family of father (Kip), mother (ummm..), son (eric) and daughter (Becca) who were very nice and loving (eh hem), some very weird old guy who works for PBS's antique roadshow and his domineering wife, this nice old lady and her apparently pedopheliacal husband, and our guide, Macarena. Yes, like the song. She was cool as shit though. The smokers were all the best hikers...I don't get it. I guess they need the time everyone else spends catching up for cigarette breaks. Glacier hike is amazing...sick views, but the boat ride back to the lodge right up against the glacier is even sicker. It was a perfect sunny day. Sign up for lunch at the Quincho (bbq at the horse stables) the next day with a couple of hikes for me and a hike and horseback ride for Marcelle.
Tuesday:
Morning hike is easy and the views are okay. BBQ lunch is phenominal. Huge lamb roasting, all kinds of sides and appetizers and of course the setting was ridic. I do the Salmiento lake hike in the afternoon and realize the antique roadshow guy is a weirdo. Get a picture of him embarassing himself. Marcelle rides horses and doesn't smile while doing it. This perplexes one of the guides. We get back and after an easy day decide were are ready for the most challenging hike they have to offer, to the base of the Towers for which the Torres (towers) del Paine national park is named. Ready...HAH!
Wednesday:
Marcelle doesn't sleep much. We're both awoken by the sound of the wind howling. Drive to the start of the hike in the rain. See a couple of sick rainbows. Brian , Andreas, Pierre, Kara is the group with Macarena leading us. Start the hike with an hour straight uphill. I have flashbacks of Inca Trail. Marcelle terms this style of hiking "slo motion"..juvenile style. Rain gets harder, cold gets colder. I'm in my wind breaker with the hood on and earn the name "Kenny" (think south-park) at our first break two hours into the hike. After another hour we reach the morraine. I instantanously hate that word. Think to myself, couldn't they have just said GIANT MOUNTAIN OF ROCKS YOU HAVE TO CLIMB. Halfway up, the rain turns to snow. An hour and half after I began, I reach the top, only to get a two minute view of the towers before they are completely covered in snow mist. We attempt to have lunch in a cave but I am far too cold to think about much except getting down. We see some German guy climbing up in sandals; what the fuck. Macarena tries to start lunch without Marcelle. Upon arriving in the cave, Marcelle is asked to state one word..hers was perfect.."Helicopter." Macarena decides to chill out the cave with Brian and Andreas for a bit of a smoke so Pierre takes up leadership and guides us down, where it was not so ridicously cold. Everything was, however, ridiculously wet and slippery. Many times along the way back, one false step would lead you careening down the side of a cliff to your eventual doom. I had only two thoughts the whole way back. One was to myself -- "get back, get back, get back." The other was to people going the other way (ie TOWARD the moraine) .. "crazy ass motherfuckers, crazy ass motherfuckers." Finally we reached the van. Two hours later after a hot shower and some serious layers, I felt somewhat warm again. The nice old lady is scared by Marcelle's facial expression post-hike, which I can best describe like Mobb Deep .. shook. She said she wanted the smiling Gray Glacier Marcelle back. Asked to sign up for hikes the next day, we laughed in the Guide's face.
Thursday.
Explora sabbath. I slept in, like a baby. Marcelle, almost as amazingly as falling asleep to a loud drunken singalong, could NOT fall asleep after the most ridiculous, strenuous hike I could imagine. We both signed up for and got great massages. Took everything very slowly. I signed up for the final full day hike to the french valley glacier the next day, and Marcelle opted for two half days.
Friday (New Years Eve)
Hike TO the french valley was good. Great mountain views, and sick ice formations. Brian, Andreas, and two members of the helicopter family (who by now had taken quite a liking to Marcelle and I) were with me, as well as the pedophile and his wife. Macarena was of course the guide. Once we reached the valley for lunch, the skies opened up, and we hiked back in the pouring rain. Met the sandal wearing German's friend and told him the sandals are just wrong. Got back, signed up only for an afternoon hike the next day, anticipating new years effects in the morning. We were informed of two parties..the guest party at the lodge and the staff party in the van repair shack. Guest party, staff party...sound familiar dirty dancing fans (props to Marcelle for that call). The guest party got going at about 11:57, and, after being led to a rousing count down by Marcelle and I, wrapped up at around 12:07. The staff party was sick. DJ booth set up in the upper corner, the walls struggling to stay up with all the bass bangin, packed from wall to wall with people, it was liek a crazyass rave in really the middle of nowhere. Afterwards, determined I have to be out of the country to enjoy NYE.
Saturday
Didn't feel too bad in the morning. Hit up open air jacuzzi one last time. Did the Cornesis walk in the afternoon, which wasn't too strenuous and had some good views. Finally had good weather. Got back and found Marcelle on a quest for Explora lip balm. I intervened and asked the staff, in my finest spanish, for "leeep bum." After some motioning and heavy rubbing of my lips, they understtod. Obviously, a month in south america did me good. Said goodbye to all the explora characters. Felt somewhat converted by the cult.
Sunday
Woke up ass early. Ride to the airport was somehow much faster than the ride from it. Took off, realized the whole Chilean experience was pretty nuts and felt sad leaving it.
