Amsterdam, the capitol of unspeakable fun
Trip Start
Jun 19, 2008
1
29
Trip End
Oct 11, 2008
Where I stayed
Amsterdam, Netherlands
Wednesday, October 8, 2008
Leaving our slightly creepy, very friendly, and certainly disapproving landlord in Antwerp, we set out for Amsterdam looking for a good time. We spent over 2 hours searching the city for an affordable (and secure) place to leave our car for a few days. The parking garage next to our hostel tried to charge us over 70 euros to park for a day. We ended up dropping off our car in a soccer stadium parking garage outside of the city and trekking back in. After that stressful ordeal, we immediately made our way to The Grasshopper and easily ordered some "Bubble Gum" and a lighter from a helpful salesclerk -- not an experience you'll have anywhere else in the world... After a hazy hour on the Grasshopper's open-air terrace, we were suddenly quite hungry. We crossed a canal and found ourselves at the home of Amsterdam's best french fries. For 5 euros, we were treated to a massive cone of perfectly-fried potatoes slathered in mayonnaise and BBQ sauce. We ate here at least 3 times in our 3 days in the city. Yum. Some of the best fries we've ever had.
First, let us describe what 80 euros/night in Amsterdam's red light district buys you. Our hotel had..."personality." We entered our room to find sheet metal flooring, metal sink, tiny (and dirty) steel shower, fire engine red walls, a queen bed, AND a giant red button mounted above the head of the bed just above a huge sign that read, "DO NOT PRESS BUTTON." Interesting to say the least. We quickly decided to spend most of our time outside of the room. It's funny in concept, but when you're forced to live in a steel trap for 3 days, it gets really old really fast. Luckily, the button was out of order, so we never had to deal with its repercussions.
We spent our mornings in coffeeshops (which conveniently offer delicious English breakfasts -- sausage, eggs, tomatoes, beans, toast -- all of which taste better some smoke in the morning). After setting off each day on the right foot, we spent hours roaming the city with no real destination in mind. During our days, we found ourselves at the FOAM photography museum, Madame Toussaud's Wax Museum (where we posed with everyone from JP II to Bob Marley), the floating flower market, and the hundreds of nearly-identical souvenier shops scattered around the red light district. We ate in Amsterdam's delicious array of memorable restaurants. We ate
Indonesian dumplings, the best Mexican food we've ever had, and we left
Amsterdam after eating Holland's best sweet and savory pancakes.
Looking back at Amsterdam, 3 experiences stand out.
1. The Supper Club.
This was our 2nd visit to the Supper Club, so at least we knew what to expect. After entering through a discreet door in a tiny alley, we were greeted by a hostess of very ambiguous gender. We made our way to a bar complete with padded black walls adorned with handcuffs and leg chains. After a drink, we were escorted into a massive, all-white room lined with beds. A projector screen lights up the room with trippy videos and accompanying dance/techno music. We were served 5 amazing courses (and 3 amazing bottles of house chardonnay) on our portion of the bed. Words can't do this place justice. If you are ever in Amsterdam, you must eat here. It is well worth the money.
2. Sex Show at Casa Rosso Sex Palace
After about an hour of debating outside of the entrance, Ryan and I decided that when in Amsterdam...seeing a sex show (at least 1) becomes socially acceptable (and even a must for tourists). We waited in line for an hour alongside grandparents and Japanese businessmen. Then, we found seats in the small theater -- close but not too close to the elevated stage where the "action" literally takes place. We saw 3 live couples who performed nearly-acrobatic feats of sexual prowess. We saw a young Japanese tourist get a dildo strapped to his head by a frightening older dominatrix. We saw a group of unwitting but strangely willing audience members eat a banana out of a woman's nether regions. We saw an under-20-year-old girl smoke an entire cigar with her unmentionables (yes...I suppose it is possible). Would I watch it again? No. But I'm glad I can say I did. After about an hour, we exited the theater at a loss for words and walked through streets lined with red flourescent lights and barely-clothed women in windows. Strangely, they beckoned to both of us. Earlier that day, we had watched a man piss off one of the "ladies," and he had been rewarded with a bucket of "hooker water" being thrown on him and calls of "Hey Pussy-Man! Pussy-Man! No photos!!!" I can't imagine how many diseases he contracted in those few seconds. With that scene fresh in our memories, we stayed clear of the red lights and tried not to make eye contact.
3. Vondelpark -- a sensory experience
Amsterdam is a beautiful city, but it is definitely a city. Vondelpark offers a bit of an oasis for the weary traveller -- perfect for some day-tripping. We spent 5 hours wandering the park, thoroughly absorbed in everything from the rhythm of grass blowing in the wind to the social patterns of ducks. From the little Italian man with a cart adorned with leis and blasting opera music (and selling cotton candy, toys, etc.) to the poetic sadness of a bee dying in a flower. At one point, we were followed by a chain-smoking little man in an even smaller red car (barely big enough for the little man) through a very wooded, mud path. We sat at the base of a tree (which we named Fluffy) and watched a guy play fetch with his dog for what seemed like hours. Again, our pictures can't really explain the sensory overload we experienced in Vondelpark. It will always hold a special place in our hearts.
After 2 quick days in Brussels we were back in Chicago. Europe was the trip of a lifetime - We'll worth being broke and living with our parents for the next 6 months. We will never forget our 110 days of homelessness.
Comments
where is the rest of the entry?
and no pics?