Ummmm he's on fire

Trip Start Dec 28, 2004
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Flag of United States  , Alaska
Thursday, August 7, 2008

its actually been a pretty eventful week over here in the land of Neal so my usual mantra of same shit different day doesn't really apply i suppose.  I'm going to hold one major event for later because i don't feel like having endless discussions about it at the moment so I'll hold off until i get to Thailand where i can just ignore the emails lol.  the one thing i WILL discuss is our major kitchen incident of '08.

It was last Thursday right when the kitchen went off the "bar menu" and onto the dinner menu, while we were still settling into our mind numbing night ahead when we realized that one of the grills (one of two) hadn't lit.  This was a pain in the ass because the damn thing takes about an hour to come up to full heat (ever wonder why 5 minutes after a restaurant closes you cant talk them into making you something?  once the shit is off it takes FOREVER to come back up)  Anyway, we try lighting the pilot on this damn thing but to no avail so we call maintenance.  The one good thing about working for a hotel is that they have their own on-call maint. department.  So maint guy shows up and he's digging around messing with this and that, meanwhile I'm doing some prep about 10 feet away and one of the other cooks is standing right next to maint. dude as he fiddles with this and that.  well low and behold a fucking gas fire erupts out of the wall, straight out of the pipe for the love of god, and engulfs rusty (other cook) in flames, sets  his ass on fire as he goes running down the line in a halo of flames.  The fire is still spouting out of the wall until maint guy maneuvers for a better angle and then shoves his hand onto the cutoff valve.  meanwhile, rusty as managed to put himself out minus some hair on his head and some skin on his arms.

at this point let me stop and introduce you to the third cook. all you really need to know about him to get a mental picture is that his name is Duffy....that about says it.  I'm not sure why but whenever i look at his face he reminds me of big bird but with big watery stoner eyes.  I'm pretty sure this guy has been perpetually stoned since '92 but that isn't exactly a fault.  The fault lies in this guys ability to just complain about everything which you could almost understand if he was like 50 and working "the line" but he's like 25.  we all have moments where we are just fed up with the orders and the servers etc etc but you ask this guy to do anything and you get a big sigh as if you are putting some enormous world changing event on his over burdened shoulders when all you asked him to do was get some more dinner plates.  Long story short, just picture a stoned big bird with a scraggly half assed beard and you get the picture

so to continue the story, rusty has just put himself out and Duffy is standing in shock and mumbling to himself that "its not worth it, its not worth it".  I run and tell the manager what happened and to call 911 (they didn't) and to call MY boss because she would need to know.  while all this is going on the orders are still rolling in because god forbid you close the kitchen when the god damn thing lights on fire.  I jump back on the line and start to cook Rusty's orders and its at this point that the perpetually stoned and apparently useless Duffy talks himself into quiting if for no other reason then to spend more time with his bong.  So now I'm trying to cook Rusty's AND Duffy's orders while rusty is soaking his arms under running water and Duffy his packing his shit....i was stressed.

The conclusion of this story is that Duffy was stricken with a deadly case of being a useless pussy and is gone (good riddance to a piece of shit) and rusty was taken to the hospital for 2nd and 3rd degree burns on his arm.  JJ, the cook who had the night off was called in and he and I finished out the night.  at the  moment there are only the two of us on the schedule so we don't get days off anymore which makes the paycheck very nice but is a little stressful.  i can handle the 7 days a week thing for a month but not for the entire summer.  This pushes me up to about 100 hours a week but hey who's counting right? 

so thats my story, thats the highlight of the entire summer i think just on the "holy shit" factor.  The weather is awesome or so it looks from the window.  the nights are actually getting dark now which is weird when you are used to the never ending daylight.  its actually pretty dark around 11 so at least it makes it a little easier to pass out when its time to hit the sack.  stay tuned for other events and happenings of interest.....
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