Where I stayed
my mom's house
As I longed for the monster I had to stay focused on what was really important, my son. My mom was not going to be home today so I had to watch Hunter. I pondered on whether or not I should go take another hit. It won't hurt anything and I will still be able to watch my son. Or maybe I should just start to come down so that way later when mom gets home I can crash and sleep all night. I think that is what I will do. I set up a blanket on the floor for Hunter to play on. I laid next to him and closed my eyes. I will just lay here and rest for a little bit but not fall asleep. The next thing I know mom is home. I must have fallen asleep and didn't hear a word. The only reason I woke up is because mom came in yelling at me. Hunter had rolled over and gotten stuck underneath the reclining chair. He didn’t get seriously hurt, just a few bumps and bruises on his head. How could I let that happen? How could I have fallen asleep? Mom picks up Hunter and is furious. She is still yelling at me. She says that I am not fit to raise my baby, or even to watch him for a couple hours. Maybe she is right, am I really fit to be a parent? I love Hunter with all of my heart and I didn’t mean to fall asleep.