Wiki Wiki Whatever theyre called
Trip Start
Dec 10, 2007
1
3
5
Trip End
Dec 20, 2007
Kapaa, Hawaii
Saturday, December 15, 2007
Here is what transpired....
Back for my second day of delight at the pool bar here at the hotel, I eased into things with a little Pina Colada with a garnish of pinapple and Curtis Sanford. You see, the game was on Fox for some crazy reason, my only idea was that they were involved in some weird plot to submarine their own ratings. The Canucks ended up holding on to a 3-2 win over the ducks, as most of you already know. During the course of the game it was revealed through our mostly violent cheering and celebrating that we were indeed Canadian. Knowing we had a reputation for being able to hold our booze, I was challenged by Joe Kickass (ill explain) to drink a Wiki Wiki Woo. The house special, being a copious amount of alcohol and a thimble of pineapple juice. 6 shots in total (amaretto, 151, malibu, vodka, captain morgan and I'm pretty sure the last one was liquid PCP). Now I've never really been good enough at anything to be able to represent my country on an international stage, but I felt challenged by the yankees and stepped up to the plate (dixie cup). I'm a relative novice at the sport to begin with, but I held my own after the house limit of 3 of those bastards.
Across from the bar was three girls from Australia who had just finished a marathon somewhere in Honolulu and were here for some downtime. After attempting a few jokes and getting a few laughs (girls seem to want a guy who makes them laugh, but that continues to seem to me like a steaming, coily pile of brown lies) I was prepared to buy a round for them and I hear this gem from my left.
" Hey, arent you the firefighter/surfer guy who pulled that unconcious man out of the surf yesterday and saved his life by using nothing more than your surfboard, beefy arms and chisled features?"
Enter Joe Kickass. The kind of good looking guy that girls dream of meeting when they go to Hawaii. How could a pearshaped unemployed guy compete with that? So I stumbled, rolled and slurred my way through the bill and back to the hotel room where I repeated the phrase "ohhhh Look at meeeee" in a Chinese accent about 643 times before falling asleep in my bed.
Next day I watched Law and Order reruns until my eyes bled. I tried to write in here but I couldnt do it. So now its time for my latest attempt at "going easy on the booze for awhile".
Until tomorrow.
JB
