So this is what freedom tastes like.....

Trip Start May 30, 2006
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Trip End Sep 05, 2006


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Flag of Canada  , Ontario,
Thursday, August 10, 2006

In honour of my newly found freedom, I've decided to assemble a list of the top ten things I can do now that I'm a civilian.

10) Get high / stoned / wasted etc. (Okay, that's still technically illegal....)
9) Leave the country whenever I want, and not have to worry about losing my security clearance for crazy behavior.
8) Wear whatever I want, when I want, and not be concerned with "unofficer-like dress & deportment"
7) Critique the government openly and loudly. (Okay, I did that before, but I wasn't TECHNICALLY supposed to...)
6) Slag my boss in public. (see above)
5) Shag my boss (so, I don't have a boss anymore...I could if I wanted to now!!!)
4) Get up when I want, and not be considered lazy for sleeping in until 8.
3) When people ask me stupid question, I can ignore them.
2) I don't have to prefice anything I say with "all due respect sir, but....." or say SIR to anyone EVER AGAIN!
And the all-time best thing: 1) Do whatever I want, when I want, and NO ONE can tell me NO!

And the top ten things I can no longer do now that I'm out of the military:

10) Complain about "civilians" being lazy / late / disorganized
9) Tell people to "sort themselves out"
8) Use acronymns in everyday speech and expect people to understand me, and make fun of them if they ask what I mean.
7) Use SMESC to plan my day / conduct detailed time appreciations for daily events
6) Refer to the institution that I did my undergraduate degree at as "the college" or "milcol" and have people understand what I mean
5) Tell one-upmanship stories about basic training and make people feel bad for how tough my life is / was.
4) I can no longer judge my physical fitness based on arbitrary and sexist standards once every two years.
3) Bond with my father over endless army stories
2)Pretend I'm moving when I don't want to see someone again. (Okay, I only pulled the moving thing a couple of times....)
And the number one thing I can no longer do now that I'm not in the military: 1) Act like God's gift to society because I have a degree and a commission. (Perhaps overly harsh, but hey, I DID have a stick up my ass sometimes!!)

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