A Blog for Today
Trip Start
Oct 02, 2009
1
24
Trip End
Jan 05, 2010
Hong Kong, China
Friday, December 18, 2009
So it seemed ironic that I chose to test run this approach in the land that present forgot. It's not an easy task for me, to live in the present moment, while
events gone by and those to come swirl around in my head, but two
months in China taught me one comforting thing. It's not an easy task
for at least 1.3 billion other people.
China's past is unparalleled. 4000 years of omnipotent dynasties, disastrous wars, stirring artwork, illuminating philosophers, division and unification, hope and inspiration, great leaps forward and massive stumbles backward. Museums, archaeological sites, and palaces pay spectacular reverence to all that has come before, connecting me with this country's illustrious history that helped shape the world.
It's future, equally staggering. Artists renditions and ramped propaganda unveil a China yet to come. Architecture that astounds, an economy that feeds all, clean streets, clean energy, comfort and power. China is poised to lead the world, and seeing its potential first hand, I feel connected with the China of tomorrow, as with the China of yesterday, at once excited and concerned, as its influence begins to spread around the globe.
But at first glance, the present in China felt undefined, a simple conveyance from past to future. The frenetic pace of development (Shanghai alone holds 17% of world's cranes) seems ingrained in the Chinese psyche, an attitude of constant forward momentum. To find out what it means to live in China today, in the present, and to be a temporary part of that culture, was arduous, and felt like an identity that the Chinese themselves struggle with.
As I tried to unearth some answers, I felt as though I was looking in at China like a child with his nose pressed against the glass of a toy store, fascinated by the wonders inside, but with little hope of being allowed through the doors. I stare at everything - the way they
travel, concepts of personal space and thought, social interactions. Everything is different than I'm used to. Oddly, as I'm staring in, they're staring right back, literally, with the same longing fascination on their faces.
So there the two of us stand, today's China and I, staring at each other blankly and taking it no further. Eventually we'll turn back and get on with our separate lives. Immersion in this present culture, with these present people, seems impossible, we are too polarized. I'm suddenly impressed by Chinese immigrants in Canada that have managed to assimilate.
The language contributes to our stalemate. I am constantly struggling to communicate; to find out what really drives these people, makes them
tick. They do the same, their patience for the process far outlasting mine. Our exchanges are usually confined to the limits of our
ability with charades. But the division goes deeper than that.
This culture is independent, insular even, and it feels resistant to my
influence, like I might get my grubby fingerprints on the nice new
toys. What I'm directed to see often seems fabricated, just the partial construction of Chinese culture that they'd prefer to reveal to me. National parks surrounded by large gates that require finger prints to enter, ancient temples repainted with shiny new colours, operas, dances and Kung Fu without a Chinese person in sight.
But after some searching, I find that the real present lies beyond these purposeful displays. I may be just an observer, but it's a hell of show. The swagger of the police and the people's acceptance of authority, pitiful attempts to appear Western for my benefit, the boisterousness of a Chinese meal, the seemingly contradictory rules of hygiene as a street vendor at once horks beside my food and then covers his hand to reach for it, the hilarious matching hats of Chinese tour groups, endless superstitions and back alley markets.
While it might not be instantly obvious as you travel from construction zone to construction zone, over vast distances, through smog and stampeding herds of people, if you look closely you'll find that today's China is, if nothing else, always interesting.
My time in China taught me that living present need not happen with blinders. While I laboriously seeked present China, I was connected with its colourful past and budding future, reminding me that living present is only part of the equation.
We are most fulfilled when we can appreciate the continuum of time in our lives. When we can smile at yesterdays memories, live today with awareness and appreciation, and feel excited for the potential of tomorrow.
Comments
Congratulations Simon, you have discovered the meaning of life in your last paragraph. Many have struggled for far more years and continue to do so without ever coming to the answer. Thanks for your help and perspective. Live long and prosper. You can now snatch the pebble from my hand Grasshopper.
Simon - I met up with Don last night and he's been following your blogs too. He said how impressed he was with your writing. Me too. I've been following each entry in this blog, and of course the previous one in Central America. I've seen such wonderful development and growth in both your skill and your confidence. Few writers could take on a subject as big as The Meaning if China and make any sense. But you did, and more. Through this piece, I understand China better, I understand you better, and I understand myself better. Well done. Safe travels home.
I thoroughly enjoyed this blog. It is amazing to analyse how old the Chinese culture is and equally amazing that a lot of North Americans consider themselves superior. I'm glad you found that to live present does not require that you forget your past and have no future to look forward to. To me, it is how we deal with our past that makes us what we are while the present and future provide the stimulus to make a new past. Right now, the excitement in my near future is your pending trip to Toronto and being able to relive your recent past with you-- past, present and future ,all intertwined. I am smiling.
Excellent.
So glad you thoroughly enjoyed your trip, and even more glad that you were able to share it with all of us so eloquently. Thanks!