I can laugh about it now it's over...
Trip Start
Apr 13, 2011
1
17
19
Trip End
Jul 11, 2011
Bandung, Java, Indonesia
Saturday, August 27, 2011
so, we arrived in bandung at 9.30pm local time on monday evening. we got a car to pepey's village (read: evil place full of bule hating mussies) garut, which is 1.5 hours out of bandung. after thinkign we might not even make it there due to the driver who i believe had a death wish, we finally pulled in around 11pm. his mum showed me to my room, which is his sisters before having a quick chat and heading to bed. pepey was sleeping on the couch in the lounge room, and we were due to wake up at 3am for food, as ramadhan fasting is from 4am to 6pm.
basically, the next few days i spent between the lounge room and my bedroom. pepey fasted for one day, then took to hiding in my room and smoking cigarettes and eating mandarins when he should have been fasting, ha ha!
lucky for me, being a woman kicked in the day after we arrived, which resulted in a town-wide search for tampons. now, let me explain something to you. indonesians don't use tampons as they believe it breaks the hymen, thusfor resulting in you no longer being a virgin. however, as a virgin myself i still like to use them. this involved explaining to pepey what on earth one was ('what is it for, cleaning?') and then him having to translate at the 5 or so stores we went to - which then resulted in me getting stared at like i have two heads. so i got to enjoy the luxury that is 35cm long pads - pempers - and unless my vagina is actually on the inside right of my thigh, they are SHIT.
in garut, each village has a security man. i'm not exactly sure of the purpose of these, but whatever. anyway, the security man (lets call him DH for now, dick head) told pepey's parents i could stay at the village for a maximum of one week, as we were not engaged or married, and should not be staying together in what is a fanatic muslim village. so, upon hearing this i wasn't too devastated as it was pretty boring and i missed bali, and my dog (more on him later). hotels were $140 a night so there was no way i could stay there either. so we checked out flights, and decided i would take a train to surabaya (east java) where i would meet up with my friend lubis (who owns the warung) and travel round east java with him and his family before driving home to bali.
enter: the next day. one of the neighbours has had a fit about me staying there, despite the fact we are in different rooms, and DH told pepey it would be best if i left tomorrow. after much hunting online for trains, planes and everything in between, it was organised that i could stay at my boss's friends house in bandung for a few days before heading to east java.
after goodbyes with his family the following day, we headed to bandung on the local bus, i.e. minivan. after what was a 3 hour trip where again, the driver seemed torn between staying on the road and driving off a cliff, we arrived at the tattoo studio where i was to meet david's friend. i was understandably stressed, tired and hungry and just wanted to go to sleep. after waiting for two hours, pepey said i didn't know my village would be like that, but you must respect the culture. it wasn't his fault, but i exploded. cue: 'i have done NOTHING but f***ing respect your f***ing culture, i have done everything they have wanted what more could i possibly f***ing do!?! i think it's about time YOUR culture started having some f***ing respect for my culture!'. now, as most of you know, pepey's english isn't fantastic, so i think all he got out of this was f*** and culture. a tearful conversation with laura followed including me ranting about being stranded in a stupid town where nobody speaks english. my phone then rang, and it was david, my boss. he said his friend fely would be arriving at the tattoo studio soon, and she would be able to help me look for a hotel when she got there. huh? hotel? david asked me where i was staying tonight (it was by now 9pm) and i replied i thought i was staying at fely's, to which he then announces fely does't have any room at her house due to her large amount of kids (shoulda used a condom!). now, i would like to point out at this point, i had sms'd her asking if it was ok if i stayed at her house and she said YES. i then started crying on the phone to david, who i think was mildly horrified. i then threw a massive tantrum, and then demanded that pepey somehow get me to jakarta (3 hours away if there is no traffic) so i could get a flight back to bali, as the only one available from bandung in the next five days included a 5 hour stopover in jogjakarta., we grabbed a taxi to the bus terminal, and pepey was on his phone to friends trying to organise something to solve our problems. upon arriving at an atm and mini mart, pepey had got into contact with one of his friends who said there was a bus leaving at 1am to bali, which would take two days. i was more than happy with this, so we waited for about an hour for his friend to arrive. we then drove around for the next hour looking for said bus, before giving up and checking into a hotel for the night. there would be a bus leaving bandung at 2pm to bali the following day.
jump to the next morning: the bus is fully booked. i know the only flight out of this joint for the next few days is around 2pm with lion air, via 5 hour stopover in jakarta. cue taxi ride to the airport, and wham bam thank you mam ticket is booked. now, i'm in jogjakarta killing time until my flight at 8.50pm. thank god i have found a starbucks with free wifi where i can hermatise before looking round the shopping mall.
i'm possibly heading off to the gili islands tomorrow to meet up with my new friend samantha. she's from england and 30 and absolutely lovely. she has a boyfriend from lombok island who - wait for it - is married with two kids, but is muslim so he wants to make her his second wife. there is a billion of these kinds of men roaming around indonesia, but it's her first trip here and she's convinced it's love. so i may head to the gilis, but that means having to see him when i just want to hit him in the face.
anyway, thats enough for now, oh my jesus there is a kids crawling on the floor and i just had a heart attack thinking it was some freak with no arms or legs. please GET ME BACK TO BALI!!!
