I've resorted to displaying a countdown on my computer. 67 days until take-off. 69 days until Jennie and I land in Bangkok. However, it will only truly feel real when we board that plane. No amount of organizing or daydreaming will give me the satisfaction that I'm looking for.
67 days... that is too far away. Thats about 1600 hours. That is brutal.
I'm trying to fill my days, aside from the usual plus packing, "organizing" and "daydreaming" with things that I know I will or may already take for granted here in Canada. Hiking, swimming, camping and all of the other sports and recreation that even my small town offers are amazing. I only just came to realize how brilliant Canadians "backyards" can be. There is so much more than I originally thought, so much to experience, and definitely not enough time to do it all. Just the other day I went hiking with a friend to Beadnell Lake in the alpine country west of town. It was a small day trip, mostly done with a truck on the logging roads (1 hour drive) and limited actual hiking (45 minutes) but it brought us to a place where it seemed only we had discovered it. Thats clearly not the case, but it was just so clean and undisturbed. For a few hours it was the best place on earth.
Then suddenly and seemingly so harmlessly, a thought just barely brushed through my mind. Quite standard, I assume most of us have thousands apon thousands of thoughts per day but this thought killed my buzz with almost no effort.
With one simple thought my amazing day-adventure in all of its beauty and glory was squashed in a fraction of a second. The mid summer heat, bashing through the trails with a backpack full of sandwiches and beer coming through to a view like I'd never seen, on top of mountain sitting on a rock bluff perched over a crystal clear lake. Flattened. I still appreciated where I was and what it offered, but it didnt change that I was completely removed from "the moment."
This trip is a curse, only until it turns into a blessing.