Cave Dwelling
Trip Start
Nov 14, 2007
1
90
92
Trip End
Apr 20, 2009
I am writing from the centre of Turkey, 30 feet deep within my very own cave. I have an 'ADSL' internet connection and I am sitting at a pentium powered 'DELL' industries personal computer. 'Manuel' has brought me a soothing hot glass of apple tea (after all it is rather chilly outside) and has just adjusted the central heating to a balmy 24 degrees centigrade. My toes have feeling and my nose is not leaking like a Labour Caucus: Life is looking up, Cave Dwelling has never been so easy.
This morning, instead of grinding wheat seeds on a rock to make flour and later charred bread, Christina and I went for a slow walk to the Rose and Red Valleys. While we were there, instead of hunting for elk with sharpened sticks, we ate a neat lunch of 4 food groups, prepared and packed in the morning from our kitchenette, which had all the recommended daily amounts of vitamins and minerals stipulated by the Australian Food Council.
Instead of skinning the Elk to fashion a tunic for needed shelter from the rain, we un-sheathed our gortex fibre, woven ceramic, NASA affiliated, Canadian patented, America's cup winning, instantly flammible, but thankfully water and wind proof jackets. We then navigated our way through the labrynthine gorges of Cappadocia using a copper strip suspended in water within a calibrated circle of degrees- otherwise known as a 'Compass'. Thankfully on this occasion smoke signals were not necessary to warn the tribe of 'Homo Germanopithicus Touristus' that our imminent convergence on their Swedish made wagon was imminent and unavoidable- I cautioned Christina:
"Eyes ahead, and for God's sake don't mention the War!"
We past peacefully with only a salutory head-nod to give credit to their expert disguises ('Americanus' clothing rather than their more customary lederhosen).
The light reflecting off the beautiful Red and Rose Valleys was then captured as an image on a digital sensor the size of a postage stamp inside a small black housing which I often carry with me. A short barrel of glass optics provided some necessary manipulation to the size and focus of the image. I set my 'White Balance Meter' to 'Cloudy'. I under-exposed most 'shots' by one full 'F Stop'.
When I got back to my cave I sorted through my 'shots' and deleted those which were not good. There was no need for me to paint my days experience on my cave wall with red ochre- Instead I 'uploaded' them onto this 'site' using the DELL, with its pentium processor and ADSL 'connection'.
But now I am getting the yawns and have to check into the cave that I sleep in. It is opposite the one I am in now, beneath the cave where the Britons and Gauls sleep. They fight alot amongst each other and sometimes it is uncomfortable to see them in the communal latrines. It is fair to say that, generally speaking, we have different habits to the Britons and Gauls: I don't need to knock my gırlfriend out with a club so that she will come and sleep in the cave- She goes to sleep whenever and wherever she likes.Thank Zeus!
This morning, instead of grinding wheat seeds on a rock to make flour and later charred bread, Christina and I went for a slow walk to the Rose and Red Valleys. While we were there, instead of hunting for elk with sharpened sticks, we ate a neat lunch of 4 food groups, prepared and packed in the morning from our kitchenette, which had all the recommended daily amounts of vitamins and minerals stipulated by the Australian Food Council.
Instead of skinning the Elk to fashion a tunic for needed shelter from the rain, we un-sheathed our gortex fibre, woven ceramic, NASA affiliated, Canadian patented, America's cup winning, instantly flammible, but thankfully water and wind proof jackets. We then navigated our way through the labrynthine gorges of Cappadocia using a copper strip suspended in water within a calibrated circle of degrees- otherwise known as a 'Compass'. Thankfully on this occasion smoke signals were not necessary to warn the tribe of 'Homo Germanopithicus Touristus' that our imminent convergence on their Swedish made wagon was imminent and unavoidable- I cautioned Christina:
"Eyes ahead, and for God's sake don't mention the War!"
We past peacefully with only a salutory head-nod to give credit to their expert disguises ('Americanus' clothing rather than their more customary lederhosen).
The light reflecting off the beautiful Red and Rose Valleys was then captured as an image on a digital sensor the size of a postage stamp inside a small black housing which I often carry with me. A short barrel of glass optics provided some necessary manipulation to the size and focus of the image. I set my 'White Balance Meter' to 'Cloudy'. I under-exposed most 'shots' by one full 'F Stop'.
When I got back to my cave I sorted through my 'shots' and deleted those which were not good. There was no need for me to paint my days experience on my cave wall with red ochre- Instead I 'uploaded' them onto this 'site' using the DELL, with its pentium processor and ADSL 'connection'.
But now I am getting the yawns and have to check into the cave that I sleep in. It is opposite the one I am in now, beneath the cave where the Britons and Gauls sleep. They fight alot amongst each other and sometimes it is uncomfortable to see them in the communal latrines. It is fair to say that, generally speaking, we have different habits to the Britons and Gauls: I don't need to knock my gırlfriend out with a club so that she will come and sleep in the cave- She goes to sleep whenever and wherever she likes.Thank Zeus!


