Fire on Plane!

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• Entry from Chiang Mai

Trip Start Feb 02, 2010 Trip End Feb 15, 2010

  Chiang Mai, Thailand
Wednesday, February 3, 2010

Luckily the above was quickly followed by... hold on, i'm too far ahead.  Let me start at the beginning.  I flew Thai Airways from LHR overnight to Bangkok.  Thai Airways is not as good as they were about 10 years ago which was my last trip with them, the plane was a bit dodgy looking and everyone in economy had to watch the same film at the same time on the same screen (pretty much) although the food was as passable as airline food gets.  So, really it was ok.  I think I was spoilt on my last trips with individual screens and choice of what to watch and when so it was good to be brought back to reality at least that's what I kept telling myself as I was forced through Invention of Lies with Ricky Gervaise.  Once I arrived in Bangkok's super modern airport I went through to the boarding gate for my connecting flight to Chiang Mai.  The gate was stuffed full of passengers although I did spot one seat and headed over to it.  In typical British fashion I plumped myself down with a satisfied sigh next to the nice Buddhist monk and gave him what i thought was a respectful yet cheery smile.  The monk immediately swapped seats with the chap next to him.  Not a good start.  I have discovered since that they are not allowed to be touched by females so I guess he thought I was going to get a bit lairy (perhaps my smile was misleading) and sensibly removed himself from a potentially disastrous situation.  My reputation precedes me.  I didn't know that Buddhist monks were not to be touched, etc, at the time of course (due to my insistence on only reading the guidebooks on the way across on the plane and on the way back - i'm such an excellent traveller - not) so just took it personally as is my right as a British citizen.  I should mention that I have had nearly no sleep on the way across on my night flight due to two gentleman on a trip to see their lady friends in Pattaya who  exclaimed cheerily that they "never slept on flights" the next morning.  A fact I can confirm having listened to them all through the night whilst the rest of the plane was eerily silent.  Nothing could remove their excited conversations from my mind.  Both of them had worked as sailors and both fit the profile of aging seamen. Now my nerves were jangled so, the next thing noted in my arid brain was that Buddhist monks also take precedence over Business and First class passengers.  I've got used to being third class and last to get on the plane (which, to be honest is usually a blessing) but it now seemed as if the monks were getting personal.  Another factoid is that Buddhist monks are considered the highest level of personage and therefore get these sorts of perks wherever they go.  I guess that is ok, although I would have thought that someone who had given up various luxuries (i.e. hair, a luxury many men are stripped of over the age of 40) would have also given up the luxury of being first on the "bus" as such.  I feel there is much for me to learn about Buddhism.

My friend Crow was meeting me at the airport at Chiang Mai which was a wonderfully easy way to arrive, or so I thought.  Once on the airplane I had took my seat next to a woman who slipped her shoes off immediately to release an odour so pungent odour I spent the next 10 minutes with my nose pressed against the window praying for olfactory fatigue which did not come.  Another unusual smell did float past but I had trouble locating what the smell was.  Oh yes, burning.  Then, an announcement was made over the tannoy, "This is your captain speaking, fire on plane."  Hmm, didn't bode well but luckily a minute later, "Now, no fire on plane, but have to return to Bangkok to change plane".  This is the first time I've had anything happen like that so like to think I was extremely lucky.  It felt like probability was closing in on me and perhaps this small incident will put me back into the big meadow where I could play with all the other "not under threat from fires on planes" people again.

Back at Bangkok I was once again impressed by its otherworldly modernity with a touch of Space 1999.  In the canteen you had to purchase a card upon which cash was loaded in order to get some food.  After spending what you wanted on the card on various refreshments and food you then had to go back and have the remainder of your card converted back into cash.  It eemed a bit of a long way round, maybe just a simple case of job creation.  An hour or so later we were all back on another plane and I was seated once again next to the woman, it took her moments to kick off her shoes and I had gone back in time. 

This time we reached Chiang Mai safely if a bit late.  One word though to anyone travelling into Chiang Mai... there is a bit of a scam with the taxis at the airport.  If you get a taxi from the domestic terminal (one end of the building) you will get into town for 120 baht... if you get a taxi from the international terminal they will suggest you pay 50 baht "airport tax" before getting you a taxi which will probably charge you about 120 baht to get into town.  I know that 120 baht is about £2 odd and a bargain whatever the situation if you come from London but I dislike being charged extra money however much just from not knowing where to get a cab from.  There, another quick rant over and done with.  I will change the name of this blog to "Angry ranting woman goes to Thailand".  On arrival into Chiang Mai you are immediately enveloped in the most delicious warmth, gentle and pleasant rather than aggressive and fierce.  Chiang Mai has a temperate climate in relation to Bangkok so is easier to live with. 

When I arrived at the hotel it was a matter of minutes before Crow joined me and we went out for some food finding a fabulous restaurant (shamefully the name eludes me right now) which was next to Black Canyon coffee shop on Ratchadamnoen Road where the famous Sunday night market is held.  The lady who runs it is a brilliant character who is happy to introduce you to lesser known Thai dishes if you're feeling adventurous and the food is fresh and cheap.  I returned here during my trip which is rare when there are so many other places to try out.

Chiang Mai is a great place.  The Old Town is situated inside a moat/wall and the business section is outside of the moat.  That means that most of the markets and tourist areas are within the moat and the road that surrounds it is pretty busy.  It has a sense of the pioneer town and the traffic is full on.  There are various modes of transport, you can get a tuktuk which is a popular mode, or a bus/truck vehicle called a songtaew which carries several people and stops randomly at request, but pretty much everyone whizzes around on motorbikes or mopeds sometimes 3 or even 4 people on the vehicle.  Only a few people wear helmets but yet I didn't see an accident the whole time I was there.  My local friend Bunny tells me that the Thai law is that if you cause an accident and the other person is the main breadwinner and is then unable to work YOU have to provide for his/her family for the rest of their lives.  I'm not sure whether this is true but if it is it works as everybody is extremely mindful of everyone else on the roads in Chiang Mai no matter the amount of vehicles in sight.

I stayed at the Eurana Boutique Hotel which was ok, if a little jaded around the edges.  The reason for staying here and paying fairly hefty prices (about 2000 baht a night although my dear friend Bunny negotiated me a discount) was its pool. The pool was great, very clean with no noticeable chlorine.  Delicious and worth the extra money for being able to lounge the morning or afternoon away in its company.  I spent a good deal of time there reading books, catching up with old friends and meeting new ones. 

I have learned my first phrase which I will no doubt repeat badly with the wrong emphasis and tone throughout my trip.  "Korp kum kaa" (phonetic spelling in case you didn't guess) means thank you, or at least I hope it does. The "kaa" at the end of the sentence is added to most sentences and denotes the feminine, if you are a man you add something like "krab" I believe.  I don't think anyone's going to rely on this note to learn Thai so excuse the lack of research.  Apparently there are 5 different ways to smile which are taught in Thai schools. I hope never to see the one that means "I am going to kill you while you sleep tonight".  I am working on just one smile which means "all is good, but let us never speak of it again". 

I had promised a friend Terri, that I would get her an elephant painting whilst in Chiang Mai. I  laughed out loud when she had first asked me but now she had the last laugh and I was going to an elephant sanctuary in order to get her one.  The camp I visited was Maesa Camp just north of Chiang Mai and Crow and I headed out there to find some art to bring back to London for Terri.  Normally I would not have gone out to such a place as I am never quite sure to what extent it is a "sanctuary".  Bearing in mind that I had had no sleep the night before for some reason, possibly Crow's mutterings of hidden treasure whilst asleep, it was going to be a slightly off world morning.  On arrival at the camp we watched the elephants being washed and then fed them bananas and cane following which there was a demonstration of elephantine talents.  Such as:

playing football and darts
striking poses
painting (more on this later)
playing the harmonica (this the most disturbing of all)
and finally logging.

I was ok with the football and darts (though jealous that they were better at darts then I've ever been).  Striking poses was interesting but painting blew my head off.  There are four distinct styles of elephant painting (1. flowers 2. elephants 3. abstract acid worms and 4. vistas) and whilst the handler put the paint brushes in the pots the elephant did the artistic work itself.  Myself and Crow watched on slack jawed.  I will let the pictures speak for themselves. 

It was the harmonica playing that made me nearly wet myself though, with no sleep and being in such a bizarre place it was hard to keep focussed.  On they came with tiny harmonica's in their trunks making awful sounds.  I wasn't entirely sure it wasn't a hallucination at this point.  I actually can't dwell on the harmonica playing as it still disturbs me to this day. 

After that the logging talents of the elephants seemed somewhat subdued yet still impressive.  Most of the older elephants had been used as "loggers" and remembered their trade, because of course elephants never forget.

As a final test of resolve Crow and I had a ride on the elephants.  I will not be doing this again.  End of.

Most importantly, Terri got a good picture too, in case you're interested, it was a flower one.  I think it was a good place for elephants to be although very confusing for humans.  The animals seemed happy and well treated and all seemed well.  Not that I'm an afficionado of such places.

On the way back we were treated to a trip to an orchid and butterfly farm but after the elephant extravaganza some pretty flowers and insects didn't really cut it.

One night Crow and I went out to a Thai boxing match one evening at the Tapae Boxing Stadium situated on Moon Muang Road and near Tapae Gate.  As was usual they started with the youngest/smallest fighters first so for about an hour we watched young children from the ages of 6 upwards and muscled up big time duking it out in the ring.  After that there were some women and after that they moved on to the serious movers and shakers but by that time I was too tired to continue and had to go home.  What a blouse.  I'm not sure how much I could take to be honest, It was interesting to watch in this small stadium with fighters' friends and families cheering on from the side.  The bar was run by a fabulous ladyboy named Sandy who was a friendly host in the highest heels ever.  Crow's a bit of a thai boxing freak so was well known to Sandy and by the end of her trip probably well known to the fighters too.

One of my favourite nights was with Bunny and a few of her friends, Josh, Trayle and Matt who were all either masseuses (Chiang Mai is the home of study) or about to go into a Wat to study silent meditation.  Tough call as you need to live with the monks and not speak or even meet the eye of your fellow students for at least a week and some people go in for a month.  Being friends with masseuses who are studying is brilliant as it means you get some good massage for free (or the price of a beer) so cheers to Trayle for that.  Bunny's a local so she took us to Antique House which is a really great restaurant on the river with the added bonus of live music.  It was a great place to while the evening away and eat very fresh fish along with anything else brought to the table.  Afterwards some of us peeled off to go for a few drinks and we raced around town motorcycles.  I can't remember most of the places we went to that night but I do recall Roof Top Bar which was on Khot Chasan Road.  A young clientele in a very cool roof top bar (no!) which played great music, served tasty vegetarian food and was probably my favourite place to chill out and kick back of an evening. It also has great views of the Old Town.  It was at Roof Top Bar that I was persuaded to drink Sangsom which is a very cheap and very dangerous liquour, sold in quart bottles.  This slightly unravelled my evening for me and I'm not quite sure where we also went (the name Spicy is familiar) but I had to a great time.  Spicy was a very busy place but a lot of fun where drinks seemed to be served through a hatch, although that could just be my warped remembrance.  In fact we went to quite a few bars in Chiang Mai, most of whose names I cannot remember.  There are the usual girl bars in Chiang Mai which are hard to avoid plus karaoke which is a national obsession.  Chiang Mai in general has a much quieter night club scene than Bangkok. 

I had a hangover the next day.

In the evening though I managed to make it out to the Night Market in Ratchadamnoen Road.  This is an unmissable event held each Sunday and showcasing the best arts/crafts/food that Chiang Mai and Thailand has to offer.  Brilliant colours and beautiful things add to a great evening munching through the many food stalls serving unknown meat on a stick and great fish cooked in salt.  The juices and soft drinks (strangely I kept to them that evening) in Thailand are wonderful and you needn't have the same one twice if you are open to new things.  We found a great bar to hang out and watch people do their shopping and managed to sample food from pretty much every stall.  The market gets pretty rammed after 7pm and closes at 10pm.

It was Chinese New Year whilst I was in Chiang Mai.  It was also Valentine's Day.  Bearing in mind it is only a day it was quite disturbing to be wished Happy Valentine's Day by waitresses, bar staff, everyone for several days on end.  Chinese New Year is more understandable as it does span several days.  For the New Year we went to a superb restaurant for brunch/dim sum.  For about 300 baht (approx. £6) per person we could eat all we wanted.  Wonderful clean food and an amazing view of the Chiang Mai meant that we chose to eat at the Sunflower Restaurant at the Centara Hotel in Loi Kho Road.  The food was great, service was brilliant and as anticipated it had a great panoramic view of Chiang Mai.  Although it did get a little embarrassing the amount of empty steam baskets littering the table.  Afterwards we tried out a fish feet spa.  This is a process where you dangle your feet into a tank and lots of little fish, Doctor Fish (seriously), literally chomp on the old crunchy skin on your feet. Sounds disgusting but was one of the most fun things ever.  And very relaxing.  These are now my favourite non edible fish.

Finally, and I know it is shameful that I come to this last considering the amount of Wats there are in Chiang Mai, I visited some temples.  They are on every corner and there is no avoiding them.  The one I chose to vist was one of the largest, Wat Phra Singh.  Very beautiful and a real sanctuary from all that went outside it was a very easy place to spend time in and I was amazed how long I spent there.  I'll leave the photos to the rest.

Well, that's pretty much it.  I didn't do too much else (though I did pop to the Philippines for a few days but that is a another story for another day) apart from eat, drink, shop, sunbathe and be happy. 

One last mention should go to the Tamarind Restaurant which was amazing.  It serves Royal Thai cuisine which is more delicately flavoured than that normally served at restaurants and also pretty expensive in Thai terms.  Beautiful setting though and a wonderful place to go for a special night out when you're prepared to blow the budget.

xxx

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Maesa Elephant Camp	A 2 day old elephant!	Orchid Farm	Antique House Restaurant
TukTuk in Chiang Mai	Wat Phra Singh	Buddhist monk receiving alms	Sleeping Buddha at Wat Phra Singh
Songtaew in Chiang Mai	Classic meat on stick stall in Chiang Mai	View from Centara Hotel	Crow, me and Psi enjoying fish feet spa
Overlooking the Night Market in Chiang Mai	Sunday Night Market	Stall selling dog coats and model in Night Market	More excellent food from stalls at market
Tapae Gate, Chiang Mai