World Wide Awards

  London, United Kingdom
Wednesday, April 20, 2005

C... England has been one of our most interesting countries so far! You have no idea whether it is night or day, because it is constantly dark, although the British are convinced they have something here called summer to look forward to. You can fill in over 100 pages of repeating yourself in forms and the government will give you some money if you don't have a job...about enough to buy a travelcard. We can't quite understand the price of beer either.

Funnily enough we have decided to stay in this rainy ice box after all! I guess it feels like home, even though some of us are unable to vote in the next election. Before I end up turning this into a big British moan, here is what we thought about the rest of the world.




THE WORLD WIDE AWARDS


Most Beautiful Country


1. Laos - Unspoilt natural beauty, apart from the bits the Americans bombed.


2. Dr. Congo - Democratic Republic of Congo, perfect volcanoes, another world completely.


3. Thailand, Koh Kradan - Touched by a few Thai tourists and nothing else but amazing fish.



Best Value Place to Stay

1. Lijiang, SW China - Naxi Tea Horse - £3.50 per night - clean, cosy, new and en-suite bathroom, perfect for the bout of food poisoning to follow.

2. South Africa, Montagu - The Royal Africa - £15.00 per night - Three bedroomed house!!! - Big Bathroom - Own Garden with Barbeque - Proper Kitchen - Luxury Lounge - and all ours!!! Perfect for another mystery illness.

3. Indonesia, Java - Jogja Village Inn - £20.00 per night - The only Boutique Hotel in Yogyakarta - Stunning rooms for the price of a hostel in Australia - Gorgeous pool and dinning room too - Great place to recover from Dengue Fever.



Most Expensive place to Stay

1. China, Beijing - The Peninsula Palace Hotel - £xxxxxxxxxxxper night (it was Adrians birthday) - Heaven, particularly the foreign food, when you have been living on cabbage, rice and pig innards for a few months.


We did not get to try too many in this category...


Worst places we stayed

1. India, Delhi - The Hotel Blue - £20 a night (Delhi is expensive we were told) big rip-off! - Services included almost attached bathroom with added grime, almost attached air-cooler with damp setting, no cleaning - ever!, hole in wall, paint on wall amongst other substances, front door also doubles as toilet for locals, charming roof-top terrace - also doubles as meeting place for the Delhi Tourist Mafia.


2. Fiji, Leleuvia Island - A real paradise, if only our traditional Bure could have offered more than a damp, salty straw hut, with an equally damp foam mattress thanks to the lack of windows. The school dinners and prison like salt water shower block and rusty orange toilets also helped in shattering any romantic illusions.



Worst Toilet Award

1. Most of China - Especially the communal squatting variety, highly toxic smell too.


2. Indonesia - A good selection of real stinkers here. Some including extra slug, frog and unidentifiable wildlife.


Most Inventive Toilet Award

Special category just for Africa. Anywhere will doo-doo, but don't forget your shovel if you need a poo-poo. Oh and watch out for local wildlife, but try and ignore the local audience.


Best Toilet Award

Japan! Anything with buttons please.



Best Meals

1. Bali, Ubud - Dirty Duck Diner - Very tasty crispy ducks, stewed in Indonesian Spices.

2. China, Beijing - Peninsula Palace - The best breakfast ever.

3. Bali, Lovina - Jasmin Kitchen - Scrummy Thai.

4. China, Jiuzhaigoui - Lamb on a stick cooked in chilli spices.



5. Africa, Nairobi - Carnivores - Lot's more meat on a stick.



Worst Meals

1. Most breakfasts in China, i.e. boiled cabbage, tofu and if you are lucky a boiled egg.

2. Tibetan Duck - Tried in Dali, China, probably never try again.

3. Fiji's national dish - Cold mutton sausage and equally cold greasy half-cooked chips.



World's Biggest Rip-offs

1. India, Delhi - The Hotel Blue.

2. India, anyone trying to sell you anything.

3. Indonesia, anyone trying to sell you Batik.

4. Zimbabwe, Victoria falls - Inflated prices on food, accommodation and a thousand and one ways to part with your cash for the sake of seeing the famous falls.


Most Memorable Journeys...the Best

1. Thailand - The Boat trip to Koh Kradan Island - Our boat was chartered by a group of Thai holiday makers, who were all very keen on fishing and whiskey. Not in any hurry to get to the island, they decided to stop to catch dinner and opened their stash of finest Scotch whiskey to share with us and the crew. We all watched the sunset together, while doplphins frolicked in the water and arrived at our island just in time for a late dinner on the beach.

2. India - The Toy Train up to Shimla - This was a real old fashioned choo-choo winding up through the foothills of the Himalayas to the Ex-British colony town of Shimla. Perfect for escaping the heat in Delhi.


3. Japan - The Bullett Train - We were lucky to try a few of these, thanks to our rail pass. The Japanese countryside is very scenic too, even at a blur.


4. Hong Kong - Star Ferry - For the most amazing skyline in the world.


5. New Zealand - Tranz Alpine - Technicolour Beauty.



Even More Memorable Journeys

1. China - The Coach Journey to Jiuzhaigoui - 14 Hours of listening to Chinese commentary on a bargain coach trip for Chinese tourists, supposedly quicker than getting the bus.
Thank heavens we found heaven at the end of it, however the journey back was just as memorable, with Chinese folklore karaoke and a landslide, making the excruciating journey last even longer.



Worst Drink

1. Fenny! From Goa. It does benefit from a very cheap price tag. However getting it past your lips may be a bit of a struggle.

2. Diarolite, from the backpack. This salty solution is a saviour for most ailments, especially good though at replacing lost fluids after a heavy night of Fenny.

3. Rice Whiskey, from Laos. Easily mistaken for petrol, your first is always your worst, but most of your tastebuds have dissolved by the next shot. A whole bottle is cheaper than a Panda Pop.

Best Drinks

1. Singapore Slings at Raffles - from Singapore surprisingly.

2. Sweet lime and soda - everywhere in India.

3. Lassis!!!! India.

4. A cold coke and a packet of salty crisps, almost as good as using Diarolite.


Strangest Meals

1. Scorpions in Vietnam - taste like bacon.

2. Grubs in Vic Falls - taste like grubs.

3. Ants in Australia - taste like lemonade.

4. Warthog, Camel and various Anteloppes in Africa.

5. Numerous pig body parts from China.


Best Attractions

1. Democratic Republic of Congo - Gorillas


2. Zimbabwe - Walking with Lions


3. China - Great Wall of China


4. Cambodia - Angkor Wat


5. Java - Borobadour



Friendliest People

1. Fiji

2. Japan


3. Laos


Best Looking People

1. Thailand


2. Geisha in Japan



Best Beach

1. Australia, Whitsundays - Whitehaven


2. Anywhere in Fiji


3. Thailand, Koh Kradan Island

4. Zanzibar



Our journey ends here... Thanks for following.